5 Tips From Relationships Experts for Healing After Divorce
Have you recently survived a divorce and feel you lost a piece of yourself? Your world is not the same, and a part of your identity is in flux.
As you go through the motions of the divorce process, it may seem like you are in an alternative universe. Once you have survived, you are left with wounds that need to heal. That is where psychotherapy can be extremely helpful as you rebuild a new you.
Relationship therapists have several suggestions to help you move through the process of healing from an unwanted divorce. You can find yourself, but it takes patience, work, and guidance.
How Can I Get Over a Divorce?
For many, a divorce feels similar to losing a loved one or any other traumatic life-changing event. Understand you are not alone, and through the experience of others, you can find relief. Experts in the psychotherapy industry have several suggestions proven to help you heal from divorce.
Allow Grief to Flow
Just as with any loss in life, it's okay to experience grief. Memories of the positive and the negative both flow through your mind. It's even okay if you feel the urge to look through old pictures or videos. Just don't allow it to become obsessive and hinder your process of healing.
Also, experience the emotions that accompany grief. You will likely feel sadness, anger, and at times happiness or humor remembering certain experiences. All of these emotions are normal, so do not numb them or label them as bad.
It might be helpful to set a time limit for grieving. Too much time spent ruminating or focusing on the negative can become destructive. To move forward, you need to find joy again.
Form Strong Friendships
Not only do you want to strengthen your current friendships, but the time after the divorce is perfect for establishing new bonds as well. Sometimes those you know for a long time can seem distant after divorce. It may be because they are unsure of how to be supportive or because they do not want to be in the middle of the situation.
Keep your focus on those who are there when you need them. If you question loyalty, then it may be better to distance yourself. Relationship therapists suggest giving time to meet new acquaintances who share similar interests.
Where can you meet new people? There are plenty of opportunities, including volunteer groups, online support groups, or exercise classes. Find your passion and branch out to others who are just as enthusiastic as you.
Take Time Before a New Relationship
It is not unusual to want to jump into a new relationship out of fear, loneliness, or grief. Not only could doing so harm yourself, but you are also not looking out for the other person's best interests. You will be able to date again when you are healthy and have healed.
By working through psychotherapy and self-help issues, you will be able to bring your best self to a new relationship in time.
Explore Life While You Heal
Rather than jumping into a new relationship, use the time to focus on new areas of life. In addition to forming new friendships, you may want to use the time to expand on your career or self-improvement.
Many use the transition period after divorce to master new hobbies, learn new skills, or begin a new exercise routine. All of these suggestions are healthy and will build your self-confidence in the interim.
Take Time to Meet Yourself Again
If you are unsure what you even would like to explore in life, now is the time to meet yourself again and future it out. Because you are no longer part of a couple, you can engage with people of your choice, eat where you like, and use your spare time to do the things you enjoy.
Those in the psychotherapy field often find recently divorced clients feel they don't know who they are without their spouse. With an alternative perspective, you can view it as a new found freedom or gift to now be able to discover yourself. Do not be afraid to seek professional help if you are struggling, as they can guide you through self-discovery.
How Can Psychotherapy Help Me After Divorce?
Psychotherapy or help from a relationship expert is often a blessing after an unwanted divorce. Some people turn to addiction, avoidance, or isolation, which will only hinder progress.
Through work with an expert, you can not only work on core issues and grief but find ways to move forward with your life. Never be afraid of asking for help, and use it as a tool to help you propel to a higher self.